CP Strong Community Stories: Dayna
By: Dayna Dobias
Having cerebral palsy has had a profound impact on my life, but it has never defined who I am. And it never will.
My name is Dayna Dobias. I have always had a passion for disability advocacy and inclusion. However, my disability was always something I was always shy and hesitant to speak about. Over the last few years I have become more vocal and have wanted to share about my cerebral palsy to build awareness and visibility, to relate to others who are part of the community and to educate people who are not familiar with cerebral palsy. I believe that being vulnerable and sharing your experiences is a superpower and can go a long way.
Cerebral palsy is something that I have dealt with my entire life. After not meeting many early childhood physical milestones in a typical timeframe, it became cause for concern. An official diagnosis came some time in my first year of life- spastic diplegia cerebral palsy. And with it came a lot of unknowns: Would I ever walk? Would I live a full and independent life?
Cerebral palsy can affect people differently, which is something that I don't think a lot of people who aren’t familiar with the condition realize. Cerebral palsy impacts the muscle tone in my legs, causing me to have weakened balance and a distinct way of walking. I spent about half of my life wearing leg braces and attending physical therapy to become stronger. When I was eleven, I started to live in constant pain. My leg muscles had become so tight that I could no longer walk and found myself having to get around in a wheelchair, which was very difficult since I was used to being completely mobile and more independent. When I was 12, I got a muscle lengthening surgery that changed my life, allowing me to walk again and be free of pain. Today, at age 29, I live a very full and independent life.
From the very start of my journey with cerebral palsy, I was a force to be reckoned with, never taking “no” for an answer. With every challenge I was faced with, I would rise to the occasion and do whatever it took to overcome it. From childhood to present day, I would have to say that my strongest trait is determination. From a young age, being faced with challenges lit a fire inside of me instead of discouraging me. In fact, there’s never been anything I have wanted to do that I haven’t been able to do because of my disability. I always find a way to make anything happen.
Truthfully, I didn’t grow up thinking much about my disability until it became something other people pointed out. I always had the mindset that I was just like everyone else, which I am. But unfortunately, not everyone sees me as just Dayna. It felt like more times than not people would see me as my disability, first and as a person, second. It is so important to see people beyond their disability. Despite some challenges I face and the way I walk, I am truly just like everyone else, and it is frustrating when people don’t see me for who I am at my core.
“One of the greatest lessons I learned from these difficult experiences is that one of the most important things is to be unapologetically and confidently your authentic self.”
My first experience with this was in elementary school. Classmates began to ask me what was wrong with me and soon thereafter, I noticed I was being excluded from things on purpose. As I got a little older, my bullies got meaner — laughing at me when I fell in gym class and scraped my arm, placing harmful stereotypes on me and most notably, imitating the way that I walked. I’d love to say that none of this bothered me and that I remained super confident throughout all of these experiences, but I am a human being with feelings and I’d be lying if I didn’t say it took a blow to my self-esteem. At a certain point, my confidence became dulled down and I had to work really hard to find my confidence again despite what I began to believe based on what other people had to say. At 27, I was determined to find my confidence again and modeled in a New York Fashion Week show —proudly showing the world the way that I walk on the runway and becoming the representation in fashion that I had always longed to see. One of the greatest lessons I learned from these difficult experiences is that one of the most important things is to be unapologetically and confidently your authentic self. Block out the outside noise and stop worrying about what other people might think. The right people will love and appreciate you exactly as you are.
While cerebral palsy does not define me, the challenges I have faced and experiences I have had have only made me more ambitious, determined, resilient and confident. Although there have been hard times to get through, I am grateful for the ways this disability has shaped my life for the better.
Are you interested in sharing your own story? Click the button below to learn more.
